Tiggy has reviewed the day’s departmental records and is pleased to report that all remains broadly under control.
🦆 The Department for Internal Investigations & Prosecutions has now begun its forensic examination of the ceremonial handbell and detached clapper involved in Saturday’s incident at the World Town Crier Finale. The Duck (you know the one) remains in a coma at the Waterfowl Unit of The Earl of Chester Hospital. Mrs Emmeline Peckhurst continues to sit at his bedside. The Staff Census has been put on hold.
🗳️ Independent adjudicator Mrs Constance Pickering has confirmed that North West Temporary Counting & Clerical Services Ltd have supplied a tortoise, a hare and a hummingbird to assist with the long-awaited counting of the Employee of the Week postal ballot. The new counting team is expected to begin work tomorrow morning.
🎵 Cecilia Fortescue FRCOrg was sent home this afternoon due to her continued uncontrolled sneezing. In her absence, the Department for Human Behaviour & Statistical Analysis has recovered 2,678 of the wee pipes that were scattered this morning and continues attempting to sniff out the remaining 2,186. Cecilia has set a reminder on her wee phone to take her wee antihistamine before returning to work tomorrow.
🐈 The Department for Training & Retraining has completed its review of Socks’s performance in CAT Training Exercise 6.4: Simulated Prey Herding & Claw Control and is pleased to report that she has passed with commendation. The assessor noted: “She maintained excellent target control throughout and demonstrated exceptional restraint in resisting the deployment of claws.”
The Office wishes all a very pleasant evening.
#CatsofFacebook #ChesterStationCat #RailwayCats #OfficeOfTiggy