Having returned refreshed from my comfort break, I shall endeavour to provide the information requested.
Now, where was one? Ah, yes…the summer of my birth. So, it was just as the evenings were drawing in – the first crisp, burnished copper and amber leaves could be seen carelessly strewn across the sun-parched lawns of Grosvenor Park; blackbirds (Turdus merula) and badgers (Meles meles) could be heard quarrelling over the last of the blackberries; and the weary but fragrant final blooms of the hardy geraniums (Crane’s-bill) and daylilies (Hemerocallis) were making way for the Michaelmas daisies (asters) and autumn crocuses (Colchicum) – when my father slid to me and suggested that I turn my thoughts from play towards a pursuit more befitting my notably inquisitive and adventurous nature.
Now, I believe I mentioned that my father was himself a Field Operative; it was he who suggested that, given my evident aptitude for convivial conversation and insatiable curiosity for nature and the wider world, I might do well to follow in his trail, as it were.
And so I found myself enrolled with the Royal Institute for Exploration & Field Operations (RIEF). I must confess, the early weeks proved rather taxing – the inches one was expected to cover before high tea each day, all the while carrying one’s own accommodation, came as quite a shock to the system. Fortunately, the camaraderie of my fellow trainees saw me through. Indeed, the annual RIEF Alumni Dinner is coming up. Golly gosh, it will be splendid to catch up with dear Billy and the rest of the old gang.
Oh, please… if you won’t mind excusing me, one has just received word from the Office. Dear, oh dear… the vote has reopened… it appears I must immediately recommence my mission to procure an Avian Translation Expert and, owing to recent constitutional developments, an Insect Translation Expert too from the reported organisation in the Upton area of Chester.
Please accept my apologies. I shall continue my statement upon completion of my mission, or at the next suitable rest stop, whichever presents itself first.
Yours,
Phileas Moss Esq.